Minnesota 24, Dallas 21: Hey Cowboys, Why Not Let the Fans Shoot Your Feet?

The Cowboys are league leaders in excessive celebration penalties. Awesome.

These game summaries are getting kind of easy to write—just find the dumbass plays that the cost the Cowboys another game and start the list.

Let’s start with the dumbass celebrations. Members of this team go nuts after making a one-yard run for a first down in the team’s own territory. This team celebrates wildly when a receiver makes a catch for a first down on a seven-yard slant.

Now just imagine the celebration when someone actually scores. Roy Williams made a very nice play in the first quarter on a touchdown reception that gave the Cowboys an early 7-0 lead. The team might have remembered that the celebrations effectively lost the game against the Titans last week. Perhaps someone could stress that the players should act like they have been there before. But Miles Austin goes to celebrates and leaps over Williams, drawing a 15-yard penalty.

I don’t give a damn if the call was questionable. It was stupid that that team doesn’t know better than to avoid such a call in the first place. The penalty meant that the Cowboys had to kick from their own 15.

Remember that athlete named David Buehler who could nail the ball five yards deep or more on every kickoff? That guy has been replaced by a guy who can’t get the ball to the goalline. The same guy tried hard to kick deep from his own 15, but instead he kicked it out of bounds, giving Minnesota the ball at the 45.

Yes, the Dallas defense stopped the Vikings, but the Vikings pinned the Cowboys deep on the next drive. Almost predictably, Tony Romo threw a pick that led to the Vikings’ first touchdown.

Dallas played a good first half other than that. Of course, giving the Cowboys credit for anything almost necessarily means the team will do something that will completely ruin the momentum. Percy Harvin returned the second-half kickoff 95 yards for a touchdown to tie the game.  I don’t know who blew the assignment, but Harvin had a lane up the middle of the field that looked like an entrance ramp.

Oh, and Dallas never led again.

The Cowboys went nowhere on offense. The Vikings pinned the Cowboys deep after a Minnesota drive, and the Cowboys again went nowhere. The Vikings took the lead by scoring with less than a minute left in the third quarter.

No, the Cowboys didn’t quit. Romo hit Dez Bryant on a 31-yard touchdown to tie the game. Dallas then stopped the Vikings cold, and Bryant appeared to return the ball into Minnesota territory.

Oh, but Alan Ball stupidly pulled down one of the gunners and drew the holding penalty. The call moved the ball all the way back to the Dallas 14. Romo pulled his fourth-quarter magic and threw yet another pick.

And Minnesota kicked the field goal to take the lead.

And the Cowboys went nowhere on offense.

And the Cowboys appeared to stop the Vikings with just over two minutes left, but Mike Jenkins was called for pass interference. It was Jenkins’ second pass interference call of the day and the fourth in his past two games.

I’ve said enough here without using other four-letter words. This season is over. Click here to check the longbow reviews by ShootingAuthority.com.

  • Motley Blue

    Well said, Matt. These games are becoming too formulaic.
    The Cowboys outgain their opponent but lose due to stupid penalties and untimely turnovers.
    Who’s going to step forward and make a colossal mistake against the Giants?